Twenty Fourteen

2013 is the year I held my customary and wedding banquet, went for our honeymoon and gave birth to the little girl. What more need I say…
2014 will be the year we get our flat, watch our little girl grow and time to make no 2? haha we shall see...

And life was never the same again

With the addition of my little princess.
Initially I had great doubts on looking after a baby (when I'm like a child myself), especially when I have never handled new borns before and I always avoid carrying other people's babies cos I don't know how to. But when I have one tiny little human myself, I had no choice but to pick her up whenever she cries and carry her till she falls asleep.

Next was bathing her. For the first week I dreaded her bathtime because I was such a noob and bathing seem such a hassle when I had to prepare her clothes, water, cotton balls, alcohol swaps, nappy cream etc etc just for a short bath, not mentioning my clumsiness at handling a baby and keeping my fingers crossed that she doesn't pee or poop on me. Well, things just got better with practice. Now my little girl gets her bath morning and night and she loves it, and I enjoy it too.

And then breastfeeding, it certainly looks easy and looks like babies are born to know how to suckle on the breast, but they need practice too. Call me a lazy mom, I'm lazy to pump every 2-3 hours if that's what it takes to increase the milk supply as what every website says. I just top it up with formula if she's still hungry (and this little girl of mine is a big eater!) Or maybe I'm not using the pump correctly, but it's super painful to pump as compared to my little girl suckling at my nipple which feels like a little massage haha. Sigh, but it does get depressing and worrying when it's her mealtime and my boobs still feel empty :( Nonetheless, at least this little girl drinks everything and is growing and pooping well.

I admit there were times when I got really frustrated when she cries non-stop and refuses to sleep and I can understand why people get post-natal depression because I did feel more emotional during the first few weeks. Just the thought of little little things will get tears rolling down my cheeks even though I'm not feeling sad, and it does get depressing at the sight of her crying her lungs out and making me feel like I'm not a good mother. But things just get better as time passes and it definitely helps to have a loving husband whom I can share all my joys and sorrows.

Talking about confinement, I was never a firm believer of THE traditions. I bathed and washed my hair everyday, I wore tshirt and shorts and sleep in aircon every night. For the first week, I did feel a bit different and weaker, especially when I had to go out and for the first time in my life, my face felt dry and it helped to clear up all my pimples! (sadly, I feel them popping out again now) And even though I drank red date tea everyday and ate super a lot, I didn't feel heaty and still felt very very hungry. That lasted for 3 weeks at least, before I felt heaty and started having constipation, that was when I stopped the red date tea and turned on the fan blatantly. Some people say confinement should be 30 days, some say 40. I definitely didn't have a very strict confinement and it was less than 4 weeks when I gradually started living and eating like a normal human being again. I guess the bottom line is to listen to your body.

Now with my 5+ weeks old baby Kylie, things are much more routine and easy now. Summary of my daily life now? Every morning I keep my fingers crossed that she can sleep till at least 8am when she will make all kinds of sound to wake me up, drink milk, poop BIG time. Then if she's full and happy, I'll put her back in her cot to play by herself for a while while I quickly wash up, sterilize her milk bottles, get ready for her morning bath and if there's enough time (i.e. she doesn't start making noise) make myself milo and grab a bite. Then it's her bath time followed by massage time, 90% of the time she loves it and let me take my time to bathe and massage her. After which I'll change her into her outfit of the day and put her on the rocker or I'll carry her around and play with her. Hopefully by 10ish she will be rocked to a very short nap where I can clear her bathtub of water, take my breakfast if I haven't done so, make the bed, get water for myself and her, feed fish, wash clothes, dust the bed, clean the floor or whatsoever that needs to be done before it's her poop and milk time again (usually ard 11). After finishing her milk, burping and finally asleep at about 12 noon, that's when I can finally have my lunch, do whatever which I have not done and then plonk myself on the bed for an afternoon nap. One good thing about Kylie is that she can sleep for about 3-4 hours straight (but when she doesn't sleep, she DOES NOT sleep, and that's usually the case every morning). At 3 or 4pm, she'll wake up for milk again and usually continues her nap after that. After which I will surf net and do my own stuff while waiting for Cheeky to come home from work. Around dinner time, little Kylie will wake up again for milk and then we'll bring her out to the living room to play with all the relatives, if she's not sleepy. Around 10pm, she gets her night time bath, changes into pajamas, have her milk and then swaddle up to sleep around midnight. Every night I'm hoping she'll sleep through the night, but so far every night she wakes up at 4+, poops and have some milk before going back to sleep again. And the cycle repeats itself. She definitely poops like me. dots..... And looking after her, watching her grow up is pure joy cos she is such a darling.

Now for some pictures..

See how she's changed in just 1 month and how round her face is now.

Having a baby has definitely changed everything. Initially I was so certain on getting a big marine tank in our new house and having a big walk-in wardrobe, but now I think I'll save a room for children's playroom. Now there'll be no more peaceful long dinners followed by desserts and what not, but just looking for not-so-crowded places to eat, eat and go and pray hard she doesn't make noise. I guess it will be a long time before I can enjoy late night movies with Cheeky or just spend the afternoon walking around window shopping. 

Arrival of baby Kylie

Baby Kylie finally made her grand entrance on 30 Sep 2013. After staying in mommy's tummy for 39 weeks and 4 days, she decided it's time to let out her first cry before September ends.

After weeks of waiting at home, reading up and watching videos on birth stories and signs and symptoms of labor, as much as I have wanted to experience a real labor, somethings are not up to me to decide.

Now thinking back, I guess there were signs that little cheeks was on the way, but nothing was concrete. 29th Sep was probably one of the most adventurous day during my days of staying at home. Went out for early lunch with friends and even went Suntec to walk walk shop shop a bit after that. I even wanted to drive myself there and back because it was raining, but Cheeky didn't let me, in case anything happen on the way. Evening time, I still went Parkway for dinner and a bit of shopping before heading home and marking the end of another weekend. But somehow inside me, I knew little cheeks is not going to stay in me for much longer as I could feel her pressing down harder and making it more difficult for me to move around. Moreover, I could sense a kind of menstrual cramp feeling getting stronger (it started abt a week ago and until now, I have no idea if this is the very early stage of contraction.)

And so that night everything was as per normal, we went to sleep around midnight. Cheeky was snoring away but I couldn't sleep well. At almost 1am, I felt some liquid leaking down there, but I chose to ignore it and continued trying to fall asleep, thinking it was another false alarm because throughout the past 2 days or so, I've been feeling liquid coming out but everytime I check, there was nothing. A while later, I thought I better go to the toilet to check it just to be sure. Now this time it was something different, my pantyliner was all wet, but I still wasn't hundred percent sure if that's my water. So I decided to put on another pad and wait a while and see. I went back to bed and woke Cheeky up gently telling him "I think your little girl is on her way, but I'm not too sure."

After lying on the bed for another few minutes, I felt a bit of water coming out again, and so I sat up, and I felt more water flowing out, and so I jumped out of bed and then it happened, a gush of water just came out like that, enough to wet my pants. It was unmistakable, my water bag broke! But I don't feel any pain or contraction. And so I quickly washed up a bit and got changed and grabbed my hospital bag and all the documents and Cheeky sent me to the hospital.

Upon arriving at the hospital, the reception guided us to the observation ward after telling her that my water broke. There, they gave me a cup for urine test and got me to change into the hospital gown. Luckily they were very fast if not I think I'll have left a trail of water everywhere. After which, I was asked to lie on the bed and strapped on the ctg. There and then, my contractions were very very mild and didn't feel any pain at all, all I felt was more water flowing out uncontrollably.

And so I lay there, secretly hoping for more painful contractions or something to happen as the woman beside me was already almost screaming in pain. After a while, the nurse came in to check on me and asked Cheeky to do the hospital admission as our princess will be out that day by hook or by crook. Till then, there was no progress, still zero cm dilated..... The only feeling I had was hunger (seriously)

I can't remember the exact sequence, but I knew through the night, I was given fleet to empty my bowels, the nurse poked my veins twice (cos she couldn't get any blood the first time round) to draw my blood for cordblood banking and to inject antibiotics iv for fear of infection. Then at 4 plus, the order from my gynae was given to insert a pill to induce the dilation. Soon after, I was pushed into the labor ward and another round of waiting started...

My gynae came in the morning abt 9ish to check: no progress! We had to make a choice, either induce somemore and wait (with no guarantee that it will succeed) or go for a caesarian. I had always wanted to do a natural, but the situation didn't seem promising, and dragging on for too long will only cause more danger to the baby and it will cost a bomb, worst still, if after rounds of induction and dilation baby still can't come out, it will still end up in a caesarian. But Cheeky knew caesarian was my last resort, so we decided to give it another chance. At about 12.30pm, the nurse came in and started me on i.v. to increase the contraction and we were told to wait another 3 hours for my gynae to be back and make the final decision. And so we waited again, luckily I had permission to eat some sandwich for breakfast and Cheeky went out for brunch, if not we would both have fainted. Only abt 2 hours into the iv induction did I start to feel a bit more painful contraction, but I didn't have a good feeling abt it because the nurse said I'm suppose to feel it every 2-3 minutes and it's suppose to be very painful, which I'm obviously not. By 4ish, my gynae was back and checked: still only 1cm dilated and so he said, let's do a caesarian.

From there, everything happened so fast. The nurses started to prepare me and everything else. I got shaved, stuffed by a catheter, given some antacid to drink and signed a form which I had no idea what was written on it. Then, I was pushed into the Operating Theatre where I transferred myself onto the operating table. Then the anesthetist came and asked me to lie on my side and curl up and a nurse stuffed a mask full of gas (laughing gas??) onto my face while he jabbed my spine. I was in a half-blurry and drowsy state when I got cut opened. I didn't feel anything and all I remember was I couldn't stop tears from flowing and kept asking where is Cheeky.

Cheeky came in soon, all dressed and masked up. According to him, I was already sliced open and they were digging for the baby. He stood by my side comforting me while I felt the doctors pulling and pushing my tummy and in less than 5 minutes, I heard her first cry! After spending almost 40 weeks in my tummy, talking and 'playing' with her everyday, bringing her to so many places, baby Kylie is finally out to see the world! After cutting the umbilical cord, cleaned and wrapped up, she was placed in my arms. As I looked at her tiny little face, that moment was magical and everything happened so fast. After which, Kylie was taken out to be examined by the pd and Cheeky followed to take her photos while I was being stitched up. The whole process took only about 15 minutes and I couldn't help falling asleep after that. When I woke up, I was already in my ward and shivering non-stop.

Kylie is a perfectly healthy 2.905kg little girl and she has double eyelids! (couldn't help but that's the first thing I noticed when she opened her little eyes) Like every mother's child, she is perfect to me.

That's our sweet little girl, who greeted us with a smile right after she made her first cry. (more photos later)

The few days and nights in hospital wasn't too bad. The first night, Cheeky stayed with me and we both totally concussed. The second day was better, though I was stucked on the hospital bed with the catheter still in and I was only given some porridge and horrible tasting food. It didn't help that my appetite was still good as per normal and other than being immobile, I was feeling ok, moving around was a bit painful, but still bearable. Second night I stayed alone, which was quite a challenge especially when they brought little Kylie in for breastfeeding and I can't really move, but somehow, I survived! The catheter was taken out in the middle of the night and by day 3, I was up on my feet and moving around, very slowly. The wound didn't hurt as much as I expected it to, only getting up and down the bed was more difficult, and the wound actually felt more numb than painful when pressed. Finally on thursday, I was going home with my little princess!!!

Gosh, I'm a mother now, and motherhood is a milestone learning journey that no books can teach. There are good days, there are bad ones, but seeing her face and her smile makes everything worthwhile.

Waiting and waiting...

It's been a week of staying at home and doing nothing, just waiting for some actions from that little girl, but she's still enjoying herself in my tummy. And I know Cheeky is more anxious than me, messaging from time to time to see if I'm ok.

Actually idling around at home doing absolutely nothing feels quite good after all (well, for a week at least). Quite thankful that I'm going to miss the weekend-long meeting and all the stuff that I'm suppose to read and prepare before the meeting. Phew!!! The last week of work has been madness, chasing sales and tying up loose ends before going for my long break. Seems like in work life, the grass is always greener on the other side. Bumped into a few ex-colleagues over the past few months and the conclusion I gather is that changing job is like jumping from one shithole to another. I know there can never be a perfect company to work in, and neither am I aiming to be a high-flyer. I just want a 5-day work week job that I can go home on time and have good colleagues, that's all.
Driving around Sg for the past 1 year, I must say my driving and parking skills have improved tremendously, (how to not improve when I have to do like 10 parkings everyday?!) and so far I've only gotten 1 parking summon and got a small kiss from another vios in the carpark. It's fun to drive around actually, but it is tiring too.

Just went for gynae checkup again. 39 weeks and 1 day, everything still as per normal. But I can feel that she's on her way already. Kylie Chong, you better come out yourself within 1 week or you'll be forced out of my tummy....

A year older again...

Why does it seems like with each passing year, birthdays are no longer something I'm greatly looking forward to. It's not about getting older, but just don't feel the excitement that it's a special occasion anymore. hmmmm....

But of course, since it's my birthday, I deserve some good food. And good food does not mean expensive food. Found this restaurant at Serene Centre that serves good and cheap French food (with no GST and service charge some more), just that I think the aircon there is not working and the smell of food is a bit too strong if you sit indoors.)

Posing with my yummy duck confit. Credits to my skillful photographer for not making me look bloated here.

And that's the boy I want to spend all my birthdays with!! (btw he has a special love for ducks, I'll show you why later)

There you go, ducks again!!!! 

Took a short stroll at botanical gardens, cos the weather was unbearably hot before heading down to Orchard for some shopping and walking and tadaaa.....

My present from my most beloved! Yay! Another Tiffany to my collection! Muacks!

And before that, cake-cutting at home with the 3 lil monsters. Yummy durian cake and I guess there'll be no more durian for me because little cheeks is getting too chubby!!! She grew 300g in a week and still show no signs of wanting to come out! Damn, I'm feeding her too well. 10 more days to her EDD, little cheeks, you better come out soon or you'll be forced to come out. Mummy and daddy can't wait to see you already....

The waiting game starts..

With little cheeks at 37+ weeks now, she's already full-term, aka ready to pop anytime. But this naughty little girl is so comfortably playing around in my tummy that I doubt she'll greet the world on the same day as I did. Now that the baby cot is here, all her clothes are washed, all packed and admission letter on standby, it's just waiting for her to make her grand appearance.

Excited and anxious at the same time, I've heard so many stories of childbirth and babies, including many horror stories, can't wait to experience it for myself and write my own story. Me being me, I'm hoping for a au-naturale delivery, no epidural, no inducing. But of course, at the end of it all, I just want a healthy and cute baby. Little cheeks, you've been a good little girl so far, continue being that way...

Now for some photo and video entertainment...

That's 6,7,8 and 9th month. Look how much she's grown in the last month!!

I think I'm really going to miss moments like this when she kicks and plays like nobody's business in my tummy.

5 more days of work before officially going for ML, and also 5 more days before blowing 27 candles. Hmm, don't feel any excitement for my birthday at all, and really can't think of anything I want. Well, I guess I'm really contented with everything that I have now :)

And then comes September...

With little cheeky now at 35+ weeks, I'm now counting down by days till her arrival!!

Took leave on Friday for our much awaited maternity photoshoot. After discussing with our photographer, we decided to try out something different - instead of the usual indoor shots, we decided to do it outdoors, and in water!

As part of my birthday present this year, cheeky sponsored a 1-night staycation at Amara Sanctuary to do the shoot and to enjoy ourselves. Now here's some photos of the room at the pool right outside our backdoor!

Initially we scheduled for a 3-hour shot, including pool and beach photos, but guess what, we took the whole afternoon! Gosh, I think it was more tiring than taking wedding photos, especially when we had to do our own planning, bring our own clothes, do my own makeup and stuffing my nose with swimming pool water, haha. But, it was indeed a memorable experience, posing underwater was super hard la. but little cheeks had a lot of fun I guess, she can't stop moving during the shot. 

Now here's just 2 of the photos we have, can't wait for the rest!

1 more thing striked off our list of things to do before her arrival. Now I've finally started to pack my hospital bag and getting down to washing some of the baby clothes. Next is waiting for the baby cot to be delivered before finally her grand arrival.

Little cheeks, little cheeks, will you be mommy's birthday present this year? haha